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STAGES OF MOTHERHOOD
Stages of our lives often have wide spectrums, and the parenting stage is a perfect example.
When I had three children under the age of five, I thought it couldn’t get any harder. Surely, I was experiencing the most challenging stage of motherhood.
Friends with older children disagreed. While watching me navigate from the car to the store by hoisting the car seat, grabbing my two-year-old by the overall straps, and instructing my four-year-old to hold my coat because I was clutching a bulging diaper bag, they’d reminisce about the carefree stage of parenting young children. It gets harder—not easier—as they get older, they insisted. As I was trying to keep my little ones from darting into traffic during these dissertations, I didn’t listen very closely.
Now that my children are in double digits, I realize they were right. This new stage of motherhood has many joys, but it’s also hard. After much thought, I’ve identified three things that make this stage of my life so difficult: First, the driving. Second, the driving. And third, the driving.
I’m exaggerating a bit, certainly, but only a bit. Each morning my three kids leave for three different schools at three different times. Between school, sports, and rehearsals, logistics is a full-time job. But if I’m honest, driving really isn’t the main challenge of this stage of motherhood. It’s understanding you’re no longer in control.
Obviously, when our children were little, there was also much we couldn’t control. But there was a lot we could. We could lay children down for naps when they fell apart from tiredness. We could distract them with trips to Cosley Zoo or The DuPage Children’s Museum. We could easily limit media. And we could make and monitor play dates with children who were kind to ours.
Those days are gone. My thirteen-year-old struggles when he’s tired, but won’t nap. Watching the ducks will no longer suffice when moods are dark. Facebook and YouTube can be accessed from phones. And sometimes friends bring about a lot of grief.
As challenging as this out-of-control feeling can be, this stage of motherhood is fulfilling in a way parenting toddlers isn’t. The conversations I’ve had with my children have been rewarding to the extreme. They’re figuring out who they are and what they stand for, and they’re discussing their hopes, dreams and quandaries with me. I’m proud of the people they’re growing up to be—far from perfect, but for the most part kind and compassionate.
I’ll take this stage of motherhood over previous stages any day. I’m putting a lot of miles on my car, certainly, and the road is long. But the rewards are great. -Christine Litavsky, Contributor

ABOUT THE WRITER Christine Litavsky is a writer, wife and mother of three. She's lived in Wheaton since she was four years old, and is now raising her children there. Her work has appeared in numerous print and online publications including The Wheaton Sun, The Wheaton Sport Center Magazine, Christianbiblestudies.com and Next2Eden.com. Christine loves to write about daily glimpses of grace; those often overlooked events that add beauty to our busy lives.